"The last good thing written in C++ was the Pachelbel Canon."

"If a program is useless, it will have to be documented."

"There's no set architecture in Linux. All roads lead to madness."

"If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into committees. That'll do them in."

"Computers are like air conditioners: they stop working when you open windows."

"Think"

"Programming is like sex: one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime."

"After growing wildly for years, the field of computing appears to be reaching its infancy."

"The best book on programming for the layman is "Alice in Wonderland"; but that's because it's the best book on anything for the layman."

"The Web is like a dominatrix. Everywhere I turn, I see little buttons ordering me to Submit."

"If you give someone a program, you will frustrate them for a day; if you teach them how to program, you will frustrate them for a lifetime."

"These are best-of-breed computers for consumers looking for the best technology available for advanced multimedia and entertainment applications."

"When someone says "I want a programming language in which I need only say what I wish done," give him a lollipop."

"The number one benefit of information technology is that it empowers people to do what they want to do. It lets people be creative. It lets people be productive. It lets people learn things they didn't think they could learn…"

"Encryption...is a powerful defensive weapon for free people. It offers a technical guarantee of privacy, regardless of who is running the government... It's hard to think of a more powerful, less dangerous tool for liberty."

"Making something variable is easy. Controlling duration of constancy is the trick."

"From then on, when anything went wrong with a computer, we said it had bugs in it."

"Some people think technology has the answers."

"Undetectable errors are infinite in variety, in contrast to detectable errors, which by definition are limited."

"Unix is simple. It just takes a genius to understand its simplicity."

"I just bought a Mac to help me design the next Cray."

"If future generations are to remember us more with gratitude than sorrow, we must achieve more than just the miracles of technology. We must also leave them a glimpse of the world as it was created, not just as it…"

"People always fear change. People feared electricity when it was invented, didn't they? People feared coal, they feared gas-powered engines... There will always be ignorance, and ignorance leads to fear. But with time, people will come to accept their silicon…"

"Some programming languages manage to absorb change, but withstand progress."

"Almost everybody today believes that nothing in economic history has ever moved as fast as, or had a greater impact than, the Information Revolution. But the Industrial Revolution moved at least as fast in the same time span, and had…"

"I still have my laptop but I haven't used it. I'm a paper man, not electronic."

"We live in a world ruled by fictions of every kind -- mass merchandising, advertising, politics conducted as a branch of advertising, the instant translation of science and technology into popular imagery, the increasing blurring and intermingling of identities within…"

"A program without a loop and a structured variable isn't worth writing."

"Is it possible that software is not like anything else, that it is meant to be discarded: that the whole point is to see it as a soap bubble?"

"It's pretty incredible to look back 30 years to when Microsoft was starting and realize how work has been transformed. We're finally getting close to what I call the digital workstyle."

"Technological progress is like an axe in the hands of a pathological criminal."

"Unix was not designed to stop you from doing stupid things, because that would also stop you from doing clever things."

"WinNT: All the headaches of Unix, but in a pretty, windowed environment."

"Man is the best computer we can put aboard a spacecraft... and the only one that can be mass produced with unskilled labor."

"You can define advertising as the science of creating and placing media that interrupts the consumer and then gets him or her to take some action."

"Treat your password like your toothbrush. Don't let anybody else use it, and get a new one every six months."

"I find sitting at a specially equipped desk in front of some pretty ugly plastics and staring at a little window is a very unnatural event."

"What boots up must come down."

"Look at growth, look at how much time people spend on the Net and look at the variety of things that they are doing. It's all really good, so I am actually encouraged by the fundamentals that underlie usage growth…"

"There is no programming language–no matter how structured–that will prevent programmers from making bad programs."

"Users truly don’t know what they want in a program until they use it."

"Get into a rut early: Do the same process the same way. Accumulate idioms. Standardize. The only difference(!) between Shakespeare and you was the size of his idiom list - not the size of his vocabulary."

"We’re gambling on our vision, and we would rather do that than make “me too” products. Let some other companies do that. For us, it’s always the next dream."

"The federal government is like a handicapped turtle trying to crawl around and keep up with the rabbit, which is technology."

"Syntactic sugar causes cancer of the semicolon."

"Software suppliers are trying to make their software packages more ‘user-friendly’… Their best approach so far has been to take all the old brochures and stamp the words ‘user-friendly’ on the cover."

"It was never clear that it wouldn't just stop (the WWW). Any time during that exponential growth, it could have stalled. I think we were never very confident until 1993."

"No matter how slick the demo is in rehearsal, when you do it in front of a live audience, the probability of a flawless presentation is inversely proportional to the number of people watching, raised to the power of the…"